


Mostly Fluff, Partially Angst.

by longhairshortfuse



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, WTNVSS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-23
Updated: 2014-12-23
Packaged: 2018-02-28 09:36:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2727482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/longhairshortfuse/pseuds/longhairshortfuse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of short, fluffy Cecilos fics involving science (of course), arguments, ruined experiments, weather, a little badly planned time travel, mountains and phone calls.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I Spy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [livinginnightvale (cloudsgrl)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cloudsgrl/gifts).

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecil is persuaded to spy on the new scientist in town.

The Sheriff’s Secret Police officer repeated his offer to the reluctant radio host.  
“You know it is the right thing to do. We have to protect our community as best we can. Night Vale needs us, needs you. These interlopers… they might be dangerous and our instinct is to run them out of town. Probably only as far as the abandoned mine shaft, I mean, we don’t want anyone getting out and spreading rumours of a friendly desert community where the sun is hot and encouraging more dangerous outsiders to arrive with their strange modes of dress and outlandish ideas? Do we? Mr Palmer? But the City Council seems to think this particular group of strangers might be useful.”  
“We-elll, I guess it would be okay, if all I have to do is watch them and tell you what they’re doing here.”  
Cecil frowned at the officer in the midnight-blue balaclava and shook his head despite his tentative vocal agreement. He sighed.  
“I suppose it’s better if I, a professionally detached journalist, report on their activities rather than someone with a more… circumspect view of human behaviour. How much detail do you need? I do have a _really important_ job at the radio station, you know, I can’t spend all day spying on strangers.”  
“They just came into town this morning. Confidential sources say there’s a public meeting later this afternoon. You could start there.”  
Cecil waved a flyer headed _Awesome Science!_ at the Secret Police Officer and raised an eyebrow.  
“Is _this_ your confidential source, officer?” 

Cecil’s intern held the portable outside broadcast system for the radio host.  
“Mr Palmer, sir? Your outside broadcast kit is ready.”  
Cecil could record for later, broadcast live, store secret files with dull names to help guarantee his continued personal safety in an uncertain world and play back pre-recorded material. He joked he hardly needed a studio at all but looked around furtively, in case Station Management got any ideas about making his show a permanent outside broadcast.  
“Thanks. I expect this won’t take long.”  
Cecil walked to the park where the meeting was scheduled to take place. He had a strange feeling, the sunlight on his eyelids and heat on his skin, a slight breeze cooling his arms as he passed citizens running, screaming, in the other direction. It was a feeling he hardly recognised. As he reached the park entrance, Cecil realised he was contented, in a calm kind of way, if not exactly happy. 

The park was busy. Cecil watched as a group of citizens murmured to each other in the shade of the trees and another group swapped stories of outsiders who had tried and catastrophically failed to join their tight-knit community in the past. He saw a group who appeared to have come straight from a landscaping job, their forks and spades and mattocks over their shoulders and ready for action.  
He scanned the meeting area, looking out for the interlopers.  
He saw.  
His stomach dropped.  
His pulse raced.  
His breath failed.  
It was _instant._

It was against all the rules of an impartial reporter of news, cool communicator of facts as he saw them, but Cecil had to intervene. 

He wandered over to the nearest knot of citizens.  
“Hi neighbours! Isn’t it a lovely day to welcome new blood into our town? Wow, scientists, right? Isn’t it just _neat?_ Hey, are you staying to help them settle in? I bet they have a lot of interesting equipment that needs unloading. We really should show them our _full support…_ Uh, guys? Hey, guys?”  
Cecil smiled as the group dispersed with quiet mutters against the idea of heavy lifting. He moved to the next group, the landscape gardeners.  
“Oh wow, look at all of you! And I _am_ looking at _all of you_ now. Have you come to help make the newcomers feel welcome? You are all so neighbourly! Oh! I have a wonderful idea. They’re renting the abandoned building next to Rico’s, right? It has a yard I bet hasn’t seen proper cultivation in decades. Wouldn’t it be so great if we were to organise… guys? Guys?”  
Cecil moved to the next potential mob, stealing occasional glances at the group of oblivious scientists, trying not to stare at the one with the perfectly undisciplined hair, the strong jawline and the devastating smile. 

By the time the meeting was due to begin, there were fewer people in the park. Cecil switched his outside broadcast kit on to record and approached the front, stopping a row back, feeling his mouth dry and his stomach flutter as the beautiful creature introduced itself as _My name is Carlos and I am a Scientist_ and called their town _the most scientifically interesting community in the US._  
Cecil waited until Carlos the Scientist stopped speaking. He pushed to the front and slowly ambled over, limbs trembling and head buzzing with possible conversation starters. He played a few over in his head, rehearsing silently. 

_Hi, I’m Cecil. You’re gorgeous._ Urgh, so cheesy.  
 _Hi, I’m Cecil Palmer, the local radio presenter. Can we discuss science? Over dinner later?_ No, too forward.  
 _Hi, I’m the Voice of Night Vale_ So pretentious! No.  
 _Hi, do you see science as a practical, hands-on activity? Come home with me and experiment?_ Way to go, Palmer, way to make them run a mile. _Oh elder gods stop thinking about shorts and a vest, running, sweat sheen glistening, muscular legs, windswept hair… Get a grip!_

Cecil stopped beside the beautiful stranger.  
“Hi, canIhaveyouonmyshow?”  
The words came out all at once. Cecil cleared his throat and tried again.  
“Um, I’m Cecil, I have a radio show. I would like you to come on it.”  
The scientist stared for a moment without saying anything, brow slightly furrowed. Cecil met those deep brown eyes and almost melted into the ground. He shifted his gaze to the scientist’s hair, noticing a slight hint of silver at the temples indicating an air of experience.  
 _Communication is your job, come on, Palmer, you can do this._  
“I mean, I would like to interview you. Can I squeeze you in my little booth and... Oh no. Look, here are my phone numbers. Call any time, day or night, if there is science to report. Or even if there isn’t.”  
Cecil turned round and fled with as much decorum as he could muster. Behind him, Carlos the Scientist watched the radio host walk away, pocketed the card with phone numbers printed on one side and scrawled on the other. He turned to a colleague and asked, "What just happened?" 

The Secret Police Officer was waiting for Cecil in his kitchen that night.  
"Oh! I would offer you a drink but I see you have made yourself at home."  
The blue balaclava nodded and the gloved hand pushed a mug across the counter to Cecil after taking a sip first in demonstration of goodwill and lack of poisons.  
"What did you find out?"  
"Nothing bad at all. They are what they say they are as far as I can tell. Some of our townspeople were a little unsure of how to welcome our latest visitors but..."  
"Hmm, yes we noticed. Good job, Palmer, you helped avert an unauthorised mob riot. We would be prepared to overlook one or two minor instances of lawbreaking and creative scorekeeping on your part if you would continue to observe and report on the scientists' activities."  
Cecil smiled at the balaclava-clad head.  
"Oh? I think I could manage that." 


	2. You are strongly invited...

Carlos looked at himself in the mirror again. His suit didn't quite fit, after six months of working next to Big Rico's his waistline had expanded slightly. Not so much that his suit looked bad, but it was not comfortable. He sucked in his waist and wondered how long he could hold the pose, turning side-on to the mirror.   
"Not long enough," he told his reflection. Carlos let his breath out and his muscles relax, wincing at the increase in pressure around his middle.  
"Stupid party. I don't even wanna go."  
He dragged his fingers through his hair, regretting the bad haircut that was still growing out, and went out to meet his colleagues. The wording of their group invitation to the City Council's Winter Party had been unambiguous, they had to attend.  


Cecil rummaged in his wardrobe for something suitable. _Everyone_ had been invited. _Everyone_ was always invited with varying degrees of menace in the wording of the invitation card. This year it was impossible to plead a prior engagement or, like last year, just forget to show up and send apologies later with a box of novelty chocolates. He settled on an outfit he hoped would convey just the right mix of formality and apathy. 

Carlos led his team into the hall, past the oversized tree decorated with red-stained bears with googly eyes, past the mistletoe-traps with their glossy leaves and pearly berries and black-yellow warning tape marking out the _zone of regrettable contact,_ past the holly hoopla and into the party proper. It was busy and noisy. Carlos shuddered and looked around for a quiet spot. One of his well-trained team steered him to the edge and handed him earplugs, another brought him a plastic cup of something cold and soon he was on his own.  
He squished the earplug packet a few times in his pocket. A voice behind him said there was a quieter area out the side door, a corridor that was not being used for the party. Carlos turned. He heard a scritching, scurrying sound but saw nobody. He slowly, casually side-stepped to the door and left the hall.  
The unidentified voice was right, there was an empty corridor. Carlos could still hear the party, muffled now. He slid down the wall and sat on the floor, looking at his watch in the dim glow from the single low watt bulb above him. An hour. He could sit and think for one hour before leaving. He unbuttoned his suit trousers and breathed in relief.  
Inside the hall, the other scientists drank, danced and endured the stares of the other partygoers as they tried to blend in with gauche but well meaning attempts at dances they didn't know. 

Cecil walked into the hall, carefully sidestepping past the mistletoe, and turned on his portable microphone. He turned it off again as he realised all he would record was the driving beat of the music. Someone handed him two drinks and someone else shouted that if he didn't want to dance there was someone interesting to talk to in the corridor. He looked round for the owner of the calm, almost bored, slightly familiar yet unplaceable voice but they had melted into the heaving throng. He frowned at the two drinks in his hands, looked up and noticed the door.  
In the corridor it was quieter. He thought it was empty at first but when he turned to go back into the hall he saw a figure sitting against the wall behind the door, head on pulled-up knees. Cecil squatted down and put one of the drinks on the floor next to the figure.  
"Hi there, are you escaping the noise too? I'm..."  
The figure looked up.  
"Hi Cecil. You reporting on this hell for your show?" 

"Carlos!"  
Cecil grinned, half excited and half terrified, regretting his choice of dull clothing.  
"Uh, mind if I join you? I brought..."  
Cecil carefully sniffed the contents of one of the plastic cups and took a sip.  
"... liquid."  
Carlos laughed.  
"Yes, thank you. I am not used to parties like this. In my old job a _party_ meant _standing around pretending to be interested in someone else's work and hoping they have the people skills to remember to ask about yours."_  
"Oh? Easy," replied Cecil, sinking down against the wall beside the scientist. "I'd love to hear about your work. I'm really into science, you know." 

So Carlos talked, at length, about science and Cecil listened. He didn't understand it all, but he heard to the way Carlos stressed some words more than others. He listened out for inflections and cadence and unusual ways of pronouncing words that somehow changed their meaning to something more beautiful. He listened to Carlos talk about time and about space, about things logic dictated should exist but didn't, about things that did exist but logically shouldn't.  
Eventually he realised his eyes were closed, he was smiling and Carlos was apologising.  
"Cecil? I'm sorry, I've been monologuing at you for ages. Have I bored you a lot?"  
"No! Not at all. The way you talk about science shows how much you love it. I wish..."  
 _I wish you would talk about me the way you talk about science one day._  
Cecil thought it so vehemently he was sure Carlos must have heard. He felt a light touch on his arm.  
"Tell me about being a radio presenter." 

Cecil talked, safe in the assumption that if this party followed the pattern of previous years, everyone would remember there had been a party but no-one would remember anything specific.  
He talked about his terror when confronted by Station Management, his occasional disguised grief at his interns' survival rate, the prophecy that made him _Voice of Night Vale,_ his love for his community and fear of it all mixed together. Carlos listened, frowning and shaking his head.  
"Cecil? How do you do it? You could leave, live somewhere _normal."_  
"Leave? Carlos, I will never leave Night Vale. I can't. This is the only place I know. I don't exactly feel _safe_ here, maybe _secure_ is closer. There is certainly plenty of _security_ around."  
"Yes. I had noticed."  
They sat quietly for a moment, shoulders almost touching. Cecil ended the moment before it got awkward.  
"We should probably go back in there."  
Carlos stood up and fixed his button before he tried the door. It was stuck. 

"We could see where this corridor goes. There must be another door. Scientifically speaking, there should be, a corridor that goes nowhere is highly unlikely."  
Cecil nodded and they set off along the corridor in the direction he calculated should bring them back around to the front of the hall. The corridor lights dimmed gradually, so gradually Cecil barely noticed and Carlos became aware his colour vision was gone. He talked more science to Cecil as they walked, rods and cones and photons, still images giving the optical illusion of movement.   
Cecil listened as they paced the corridor. It seemed to go on forever. Carlos's voice was calming, gave him something to focus on other than his own fear. Cecil wasn't sure when it had happened, but he was holding the scientist's hand and Carlos didn't seem to mind.  
He stopped. Carlos continued forward a step and pulled their hands apart.  
"Carlos, umm _scientifically speaking,_ how long should this corridor actually be? I'm getting a little nervous now."  
Carlos came back to stand with Cecil.  
"I know what you mean. We were not walking particularly fast but we should have reached the front of the building long ago. Can you see okay? Come on, lets go a little further and if we find nothing we can turn back."  
Carlos put a hand on Cecil's arm and felt a tremor. He put his arms around Cecil and held him for just a moment.  
"Cecil, we're okay. Statistically speaking, very few people die in unnaturally long, dark, mysterious corridors." 

Cecil did not move when Carlos nudged at his shoulder and took his hand to lead him further along the corridor.  
"No. I can't. Carlos? I can't move. I want to but my legs just won't do it. Carlos?"  
"I'm here."  
Carlos put his arms around Cecil again.  
"Should I try to carry you?"  
"Carlos, oh no. Look up."  
Carlos looked up. He saw the meagre pale light reflected off glossy leaves and pearlescent berries. Cecil sank his head onto Carlos's shoulder.  
"We are in a mistletoe trap. There is only one way out."  
Carlos stroked Cecil's head gently, wove delicate fingertips through his hair and brushed dry lips on his temple. Cecil turned his head and they kissed, lips meeting for a moment, just long enough to break whatever force held them in place. 

Carlos jerked awake, cold and numb from sitting on the stone floor and leaning against the wall. Someone was calling his name. He tried to stand and a supportive arm helped him up.  
"Are you okay? Carlos?"  
Carlos opened his eyes and fought to focus.  
"Cecil! I was asleep? Uh, I... umm. I was asleep. Yes."  
Cecil smiled.  
"Yes, you were asleep. Did you dream anything... interesting? By any chance?"  
The look on Carlos's face told Cecil what he wanted to know.  
"Mmm. Yeah, me too. Don't worry, if this party is anything like the City Council's usual obligatory annual celebration you will remember having been and hating it but you won't remember anything specific. I think it's whatever they put in the punch. Come on, the door works. Uh, fix your button." 

Carlos followed Cecil back into the noisy hall. He tapped Cecil on the shoulder and put his mouth close to his ear to be heard above the music.  
"Will nobody remember anything about tonight?"  
Cecil shook his head and motioned towards the door.   
"Why do it? Why hold a party like this?"  
Cecil leaned over to reply.  
"Information gathering I think. You'd be amazed what people will say with the right... uh.. herb-based beverage."  
Carlos made an _oh_ shape with his mouth and tried to say he wanted a sample for analysis but Cecil frowned and shook his head. They were almost at the door, then they were through the door into the foyer with the tree and the mistletoe traps, some of which were occupied.  
"So I won't remember any of this tomorrow? Not the music or the incredibly weird corridor?"  
Cecil shook his head again, slowly.  
"Is _that_ all you would like to remember?"  
Understanding cleared Carlos's brain as he looked at Cecil's face.  
"No, I'd like to remember something else. Something unexpected and so scientifically unlikely I couldn't have made it up."  
Carlos reached a hand out to Cecil. He stepped backwards and pulled the radio host over the yellow and black tape marking out a mistletoe trap. Carlos was in no hurry to leave the party early. 

Next morning Carlos woke up in bed feeling confused. He remembered reluctantly going to the City Council's official party at City Hall. He remembered standing at the edge, barely tolerating the noise and watching his colleagues try to have fun. He remembered talking to _someone_ about science and drinking weird flavoured punch, but he did not remember how he got home.  
Despite his annoyance at having been forced to socialise against his will, Carlos had a lingering feeling something important had happened. He wondered if the strange man from the radio station had been there, reporting. Carlos picked up his phone and almost called. 


	3. Not that sort of sandstorm

Cecil picked Carlos up at ten, as arranged, and helped him stow the cool-box securely in the car. Carlos had a suspiciously scientific looking bag in addition to their picnic.  
"Hi Cecil! I hope it's okay, I packed a few extra things. There's some science I'd like to do out in the desert but I can leave it behind if you prefer. I don't want to spoil our day out together."  
Cecil laughed at Carlos's face, big puppydog eyes and shy smile.  
"Of course you can do science on our day out. Can I help or are you _self-reliant?"_  
Carlos rolled his eyes and wedged the bag beside the cool-box on the back seat as Cecil got back into his car.  
"Are you _ever_ going to let me forget that?"  
"Nope."  
Cecil shook his head and grinned as Carlos climbed into the passenger seat, leaned over for a quick kiss and fastened his seatbelt. 

The journey was not long. Cecil chatted about local news and things he wanted to put in his show. Carlos replied with scientific snippets, occasionally making Cecil glance across and drawl _are yoo-oo-ouu su-uuure?_  
Cecil pulled off road and cut the engine.  
"It's near here, maybe a mile. Think we can carry everything that far?"  
Carlos nodded and got out. They set off. Carlos carried his science bag over one shoulder and they shared the weight of the cool-box. They strolled for just under twenty minutes before Cecil said _there it is!_ and changed direction. Carlos had no choice but to follow, prevented from trailing behind by a hand gripping the cool-box handle.  
Cecil threw out an arm expressively.  
 _"Welcome.... to Sievert Canyon._ Too dramatic? It joins Radon Canyon further down."  
Carlos laughed.  
"It is dramatic, Cecil, I think you pitched it just right. Scientifically speaking the view is quite rugged and, subjectively, strikingly beautiful."  
Cecil watched Carlos for a few seconds and smiled.  
"Yes, I agree." 

Carlos put his bag down and rummaged, producing a squat cylindrical device attached to a handheld display. He held it up, pointed it in all different directions and watched the numbers on the digital readout until they stabilised.  
"Hmm, a bit above background levels here but not abnormal for Night Vale. You don't plan to go anywhere near Radon Canyon itself do you? Because after a few hours here we should probably keep as far as possible from radioactive materials for, oh, about a month."  
"It's fine, Carlos, I used to camp out here all the time with the scouts, or so I'm told. I don't remember anything dangerous."  
Carlos stared at the display for another full minute, switched the device off and put it away. He slung his science bag back over his shoulder, picked up his side of the cool-box, smiled at Cecil and followed him down into the canyon. 

They picked their way down carefully in places, dislodging loose rocks to tumble and bounce, slipping terrifying inches on treacherous gravel. Carlos asked more than once if Cecil was _sure_ this was a good idea. Cecil just kept descending until they were in cool shade, making Carlos's eyes feel heavy while they adjusted to the relative gloom.  
Soon they were safely at the bottom, next to stunted plants clinging to a grim existence on the periphery of life and a lazy stream the sheer rock faces promised would be a raging torrent capable of eroding the ochre limestone if it rained upstream.  
Cecil led again, upstream until they reached a crevice formed by a fault in the rock face. He peered in.  
"This is where I used to come if I wanted to be on my own. I'd park further from the road, bring supplies and camp for a night or two." Cecil looked at Carlos, saw him nod in understanding. "I have not told anyone else about this place."  
Carlos put the cool-box and his bag down and stepped over to stand behind Cecil and wrap his arms around him, kissing the side of his head fondly.  
"Thank you for showing me. Do you... do you still come out here sometimes?"  
Cecil leaned back against Carlos for a moment and brought his hands up to stroke Carlos's arms.  
"I'm here now." 

Carlos unpacked the picnic onto the flat rocks near the meagre water channel. They ate, chatting and laughing, probing each other with questions. Likes, dislikes, have-you-evers, families, ambitions and dreams. Carlos wanted to interrogate Cecil about his lack of memories but sensed the topic was taboo. Family seemed off limits too, Cecil mentioned a sister and raved about his niece but said nothing about any other family, evading questions with such professional expertise that Carlos felt as if his questions had been answered. 

Carlos brought out another object from his science bag. Cecil raised his head from his reclined position and watched as he held it up, pressed a button until it beeped, brought it to eye level and said _hmm_ , He repeated the procedure five times in total at slightly different locations near their picnic site. He put it away and packed up the picnic.  
"Carlos? Is something wrong? I thought we could laze around here all afternoon and climb back up before dark."  
Carlos frowned.  
"I don't wish to alarm you, Cecil, but my scientific observations indicate there is a storm coming in maybe twenty minutes, thirty tops. The wind speed is picking up from... what?"  
Cecil grinned and rolled onto his stomach to watch Carlos better.  
"I'm sorry. It's just you're really cute when you get all scientific."  
"We should get back to the car and shelter there. We'll make it if we hurry. Probably."  
Cecil laughed and pointed at the crevice. Carlos frowned and nodded. 

Cecil and Carlos squeezed through the crack in the limestone. Carlos stood spellbound by the interior. Instead of the damp, claustrophobic cranny he expected, he gazed around a sizeable chamber lit by the glow from Cecil's phone display. The walls sparkled with minerals Carlos couldn't identify.  
"Cecil! This is beautiful!"  
"I like to lie in here and think. It goes quite far back, go far enough and you can't tell whether it is day or night. Time seems irrelevant."  
"Time isn't real."  
"So you say. In here, I am inclined to agree. Close your eyes for a minute."  
Cecil clicked off his phone and Carlos once more felt the weight of eyes straining to adjust. He closed his eyes for a count of _one sandstorm, two sandstorm, three..._ and opened them after sixty. There was a diffuse glow from behind, from the cave entrance, scattering off the walls.  
"It's like... it's like a million stars all as bright as each other. It's... Cecil, thank you for showing me this place. Your place."  
Cecil turned to face Carlos. Carlos saw the light reflected from Cecil's eyes and moved closer to meet it. Carlos reached up and stroked the backs of his fingers down Cecil's cheek once and back up to comb through Cecil's hair. Cecil shuffled two tiny steps closer until he felt their bodies almost bump. Cecil closed his eyes and leaned forwards, finding Carlos's cheek with his lips. Carlos held Cecil's head still and turned his own to kiss Cecil's lips, pausing for an instant, prolonging the anticipation before Cecil put his hands on Carlos's sides, slipped across fabric to his back and pulled him over the gap between them. 

A gust of air breathed in from outside and swirled dust around the floor. Cecil stepped backwards and pulled Carlos with him.  
"It's more sheltered farther in. I am... I don't want to touch the sand."  
Cecil led Carlos right to the back of the cave where they had to sit. It was completely dark. Carlos clicked his phone and for a minute the display illuminated the jewel-like pinpoint crystals, the yellowish-greyish walls and Cecil's terror. Carlos saw, and put a hand on Cecil's knee.  
"What's wrong?"  
"Oh glowcloud and elder gods, it's _the_ sandstorm. The _sandstorm._ Last time... Ohgods..."  
"Cecil, it is _a_ sandstorm. A normal one. It'll blow over in an hour or two, we can go out and everything will be... normal. At least subjectively as normal as it gets around here. Cecil?"  
Cecil hugged his knees to his chest and sank his head down. Carlos put his arms around Cecil and pulled him over to lean into him.  
"Cecil? It's just sand. Not the deranged storm you experienced before. You're safe here, I promise. Science predicted this storm, science predicts it will pass and we will be _fine."_

Carlos quickly ran out of things to say about the sandstorm. He settled for holding Cecil, gently rocking back and forward with him, listening to the sound of the wind whistling and moaning around the cave entrance.  
"Talk to me."  
"Mmm?"  
"Talk to me. About science. Anything."  
"Oh! Okay. I will tell you a story about a monk and some peas."  
"What?"  
"Seriously, Cecil, it's science. Once upon a time there was a monk called Mendel. Mendel the Monk. And he was obsessed with pea plants. He grew tall plants and short plants, plants with pink flowers and plants with white flowers, plants producing yellow peas or green peas, wrinkly peas or smooth ones. And Mendel the Monk thought, _I wonder why my pea plants aren't all the same? I wonder if I can find a way of making my pea plants all tall with pretty pink flowers and smooth green peas? What if I choose two tall plants to breed and..."_  
"Carlos, how the _fuck_ do you persuade two pea plants to... umm... you know..."  
"With a paintbrush."  
Cecil was shaking. Carlos realised after a few seconds it was caused by giggling. 

Carlos continued the story, mystified by why Cecil found it so entertaining but pleased to be able to distract him from his fear of the storm. The wind still sang at the cave entrance but Cecil became less fearful of its sudden variations in pitch and loudness. Cecil asked questions about _Mendel the Monk,_ coming to the conclusion he was probably from Svitz and making Carlos wish he had picked a different scientist to talk about. As the storm blew itself out, the cave entrance fell silent again and Carlos hugged Cecil tight once more and let him go.  
"I think we can go out now, if you want."  
Cecil put out a hand to find Carlos in the pitch dark of the deepest recess of the cave.  
"I want to stay here just a little longer. Stay with me?"  
Carlos settled back beside Cecil, put his arm around Cecil's shoulders. Cecil leaned in to the embrace and looped both arms around Carlos's waist, letting his head rest on Carlos's shoulder. Carlos smiled into the dark. 

It couldn't last. Eventually contentment gave way to discomfort of tingling limbs and they had to get up, walk around, stretch and shake out dead-arms. The storm passed, coating everything on a fresh layer of sand, scouring some of the marginal plant life away from its precarious existence. Carlos led Cecil out of their shelter and back up to the rim of the canyon. Cecil guided them back to his car, cleared it of sand, muttered an incantation Carlos didn't quite catch and they set off back to town.  
Cecil drew up at the kerb in front of the lab. Carlos turned in his seat.  
"Thanks for the day out, Cecil. It was nice."  
"Sorry I freaked out a little."  
"It's fine. Umm, I should go in and download my data, you know, science."  
"Oh. You... you need help with that?"  
Cecil looked sideways at Carlos and smiled. Carlos leaned over to kiss Cecil.  
"Cecil, yes. A scientist never makes the same mistake twice." 


	4. Confrontation

Carlos had never seen Cecil angry before. Confused, yes, often. Afraid, occasionally, shooting furtive glances around in case they were being watched. But anger was something unexpected. 

It began a couple of weeks earlier when Cecil warned Carlos about one of the experiments he planned. Carlos wanted to study the nocturnal behaviour of Night Vale desert wildlife, Cecil said he should on no account spend overnight in the sand wastes without the correct bloodstone ritual, at least one sacrifice and, preferably, the company of at least two scouts of Dreadnaught rank or higher.   
Carlos, analysing the situation scientifically, came to the conclusion Cecil was being superstitious, overprotective and mother-hennish. He came to the further conclusion the best way to study nocturnal desert wildlife was to pack camping gear and night vision recording equipment, drive out off-road, not tell anyone where he was going in case they came to find him and disturbed his observations, hike out to the canyon where a pack of spiderwolves had recently been reported and camp there. His scientific reasoning also led him to believe he should turn off his phone in case it buzzed or binged and alerted the spiderwolves to his presence. 

Rochelle assumed Carlos had taken a couple of days off to spend with Cecil. It was a little out of character for him to take time off from lab-work, but it was also out of character for Carlos to have asked the radio man out in the first place.   
Cecil assumed Carlos’s absence, lack of replies to texts and failure to call was a sign he wasn’t interested any more. Perhaps their relationship had burned out quickly after two dates and a spate of cancellations.  
After the third morning Carlos hadn’t shown up at the lab and wasn’t at home, Rochelle thought she ought to point out he was paid to do science and they needed him at the lab. She called Cecil at the radio station and left a message.  
Cecil read the telephone memo his intern handed him.  
 _Please tell Carlos to turn his phone on and come back to work._  
He left the station immediately and went to the lab. 

Rochelle looked up in alarm as Cecil strode in and straight over to her workbench.  
“Hi Cecil, where are you hiding Carlos? We need him back.”  
“I have not seen Carlos for a week. I thought he was here, I thought he was avoiding me.”  
“Oh? Jeez, he’s such an idiot. Cecil, everything he does, he wonders if you’d find it interesting and asks me if... Oh never mind. Carlos is missing. That’s not good.”   
Rochelle frowned.  
“Technically he’s big enough to look after himself, but…”  
She met Cecil’s gaze.  
“Yeah. I know. I wonder if he left any hints in his notebook?” 

Rochelle felt guilty just touching the hardbound lab book in Carlos’s little office. A scientist just _didn’t_ until invited. She picked it up and looked at the cover. Cecil took it from her and flicked through until the last page. He read out.  
“A planned observation of spiderwolf behaviour in their natural habitat… Shit. He’s gone to study spiderwolves in the sand wastes on his own.”  
Rochelle took the lab-book and read through Carlos’s notes.  
“These are coordinates. I can look for him.”  
“I’m coming with you.” 

\---------------------

Carlos was exactly where his notes indicated and very surprised to have visitors. He smiled until he saw Rochelle’s expression.  
“Carlos, pack up camp and come home.”  
“But another night or two of data would make my study more complete and…”  
“Carlos…”  
“But Rochelle, Cecil, this is so interesting! Did you know spiderwolves run in packs but don’t always hunt cooperatively? They have the most incredible night vision, they saw me in pitch darkness. It’s amazing they let me go so easily. They’ve got a real sensitive area just under the chin and if you aim just right… Hey!”  
Carlos continued to complain as Cecil examined the bite wound on his leg and Rochelle dismantled his tent.   
“Leave that alone! I am a _scientist_ and I am _fine.”_  
“You’re outvoted, Carlos, this field trip is over.” 

\-----------------------------

Carlos was in a surly mood all the way home. Rochelle drove back alone, Cecil rode with Carlos.  
“I was fine. Another night or two and I would have had enough data for a really strong paper on spiderwolf hunting behaviour.”  
“You were not fine. You got bitten, you need proper medical attention. You don’t even know the chants against spiderwolf venom.”  
“I didn’t need chants, I had antiseptic and bandages. The swelling has almost gone.”  
“I was worried.”  
“I can look after myself, Cecil, I was fine.”  
“Well I wasn’t. I wasn’t fine at all. Carlos, stop. We need to talk.”  
Carlos pulled over at the side of the road. 

“You disappeared.”  
“I knew where I was.”  
“I didn’t. I thought… “  
Cecil looked away, stared out of the window at the haze obscuring the horizon.  
“You have no right to worry people. People worry about you. People need to know you are safe. You should tell people if you are going away, you never considered what people might think had happened. People love you. People deserve better.”  
“But it’s none of people’s business if I decide to go do science in the desert!”  
Carlos almost shouted. He banged the heel of a hand on the steering wheel.  
“Cecil, I was almost done! Another few data points and I could have come home but now I’ll probably have to start all over again thanks to you and Rochelle treating me like a kid!” 

Cecil got out of the car and walked away. Carlos swore and got out too, slamming the door and leaning against it. He rubbed his face with his hands for a moment and muttered to himself.  
 _Why should I care what people think? I am a scientist. People need to learn not to worry. Why would people even care if I am safe or not? What people even care about me anyway…?_ Carlos replayed Cecil’s speech in his head, replacing _people_ with a name.  
“Shit.”  
He turned and leaned forward on the car, resting his head on his arms on the car roof. He looked up. Cecil was sitting on the ground a little way off with his back to the road, the car and Carlos. Carlos walked over and stood beside him in the dust. 

“Cecil, I’m sorry.”  
“Cecil? I really am sorry. I didn’t think.”  
Carlos crouched and put a hand on Cecil’s shoulder.  
“Cecil, I should have told you I was away for scientific reasons. You deserve better from me.”  
Cecil shook and sunk his head into his hands.  
“You weren’t returning calls or texts. I thought you were ignoring me. I thought… I thought you…”  
Carlos knelt beside Cecil, wrapped both arms around him and held him, murmuring apologies and kissing his head. They stayed there until the light began to fade and darkness descended. The temperature dropped and Carlos felt the chill in the air. He shuffled around, reluctant to move but uncomfortable.  
“Cecil? Let’s go home now. It’s getting cold.” 

Carlos dropped Cecil off at his apartment block and went home. He showered and changed, packed an overnight bag and headed straight back out. He drove to his destination and sat in the car, killed the engine and stared at the steering wheel. 

Cecil lay on the sofa and closed his eyes. It was dark out, he had the lights off and the curtains open, allowing the pale orange glow from the streetlamp across the street and the occasional sweep of headlights to illuminate his living room. Headlights dimmed and disappeared as an engine silenced outside. He shifted a little and opened his eyes, exhausted with the week, too tired to chase sleep any longer. He sat up.  
A knock at the door jerked him awake and he groaned. He got up and plodded through to the hall, peering through the spyhole. He couldn't make sense of what he saw. It wasn't recognisably a face.  
"Who is it?"  
"Cecil? It's me."  
Cecil opened the door to reveal a large bunch of sunflowers with a scientist hiding behind it. 

"Forgive me?"  
"For not telling me where you were?"  
"No. It might still happen sometimes. For making you think I don't love you."  
"You better come in."  
Carlos followed Cecil into the hallway and closed the door. Cecil watched as Carlos put the flowers in the kitchen sink and looked around.  
"I don't have a vase. Nobody ever gets me flowers."   
"Oh. I did. I love you, Cecil."  
Cecil slipped his arms around Carlos's waist and leaned against him slightly.  
"I love you, Carlos, that's why it hurt, why I was angry."  
Carlos turned and held Cecil close, kissed him gently.   
"I'm sorry. I know I said it already. Is there any way I can begin to make it up to you?"  
Carlos caught a flicker in Cecil's expression. He smiled, murmured _come here my love,_ picked Cecil up and laid him on the sofa. He knelt beside Cecil, leaned over and kissed him again, one hand unfastening buttons and sliding under fabric, over Cecil's chest to his side. Cecil wove both hands into Carlos's hair to hold him, lips almost in contact, reached up and kissed him in return.   
"Stay. Stay tonight."  
"Mmm. Don't move from here. I'll get my bag."  
Cecil sat up and laughed.  
"You brought a _bag?_ You assume a lot!"  
Carlos smiled and shrugged.  
"A scientist is always hopeful." 


	5. Betcha!

Carlos could only just remember the moment the night before when he said _I bet I can stay awake for the whole trilogy and you can't_ and Cecil laughed and agreed _sure, first one to fall asleep works a day as the other's assistant, deal?_ And they shook hands on it. Now it was 2am and he knew he was going to lose. He nudged Cecil, shook his head and curled up with his head on his triumphant boyfriend's lap. He was asleep within a minute despite the noise of berserker _uruk-hai_ and clashing weapons.  
Cecil stroked Carlos's hair, waited until he was breathing evenly and turned off the TV.  
"Hey, come on, you can't sleep there all night. You have a busy day tomorrow!"  
Carlos shifted and complained without waking. Cecil slid out carefully from under him, put a cushion under his head and a blanket over him before kissing him goodnight and going to bed. 

Carlos woke up to stiff muscles, curtained daylight and the smell of coffee.  
"What time is it?"  
"Almost ten. No rush, you're mine for the day. Remember? I called the lab for you. They were very... understanding and said they can spare you no problem."  
"Mmhmm. I bet. Nonononono, I take it back!"  
Cecil grinned and handed Carlos a mug of coffee.  
"We need to be at the station by eleven to get you kitted up then we're doing interviews and reports. You can record some science news, that would be neat, and I'll show you how the producer's booth works. You can run my show from there."  
"Oh? Technology is almost science. Thanks, Cecil!"  
Cecil smiled and ruffled Carlos's hair.  
"Do you want to go home to shower and change first and meet me at the radio station, or do you want to borrow radio-host clothing? We're interviewing, so have to be smart. Can you do that?"  
Carlos laughed.  
"I better go home. Although I do admire your taste in clothing I need something a little more subdued. And wider. I can adopt a style of apparel to convey a subjectively professional attitude." 

Carlos met Cecil outside the radio station, dressed comfortably in beige chinos, a white shirt with fuchsia pinstripes which had been a gift from Cecil, a bowtie and his best lab-coat. Cecil grinned when he saw the effort Carlos had made.  
"Very nice, Carlos! Let's get to work!" 

In Cecil's studio, Carlos learned how to use a portable microphone. The lesson consisted of Cecil pointing to a slider switch on the side and demonstrating the _off_ and _on_ and _auto_ positions.  
"Um, Cecil? The microphone is not connected to the recorder."  
"Of course not, why would it be?"  
"Oh. Is it bluetooth?"  
"What? Why would it have blue teeth?"  
"Never mind."  
Cecil’s brow creased slightly.   
"Carlos?"  
"What?"  
"You know I'm kidding, right?"  
“Cecil, all those times you say you don’t know stuff and I explain it and you get all giggly… are you pretending?”  
Cecil smiled.  
“Sometimes. I like to hear you talk to me.” 

Their first interview was with, as Carlos said afterwards, _”a dragon! An actual, fucking, five-headed dragon!”_  
Carlos hung back behind Cecil, holding the microphone in a white-knuckle grip as Cecil asked questions the dragon either ignored, evaded or twisted to its own interpretation. Cecil suggested they continue the interview over lunch. Carlos did not like the way the dragon’s green head looked at him when Cecil pronounced the word _lunch._ To Carlos’s relief, the dragon declined the invitation claiming a prior engagement with the school board and waddled off with its entourage. Once Carlos judged it to be out of earshot, he let out a deep breath.  
“Cecil? You are far braver than I give you credit for. I thought the reptile wanted to invite _us_ for lunch, but not in a hospitable way.”  
Cecil laughed as the dragon’s green head snapped round followed by the grey head. The green face scowled and belched smoke. The grey one smiled in a way that made Carlos step back further behind Cecil.   
“Oh Hiram is only playing with you, don’t give him the satisfaction of seeing you rattled. It’s a politician thing. He wouldn’t eat you, not really.”   
“Oh. Good.”  
“He thinks your lab-coat would be too stringy,” Cecil turned to smile at Carlos, “so you best wear it _at all times._ Come on, let’s have lunch in the park then go back to the station and edit this interview.” 

They sat side by side on a bench under the shade of the trees in a quiet corner of the park with coffee and sandwiches. Cecil watched Carlos fidget.   
"Do you mind?"  
"What? Sorry."  
"No, I mean, do you mind losing a day of science?"  
Carlos frowned for a moment and tilted his head to follow the line of vision of a passer-by who stared at the sky.  
"I don't mind gaining a day with you, but I would have liked to have won the bet then I would have both."  
Cecil smiled.  
"I wouldn't want to compete with science for your attention."  
Carlos put his arm around Cecil's shoulders and stroked Cecil's arm with his free hand.  
"That would not be a fair competition." 

Back at the station Carlos gave back the portable microphone and Cecil showed him how to edit the interview he had recorded. They sat together in the little studio and listened on headphones. Cecil barely spoke as he worked. Carlos listened to the recording, wondered at the parts Cecil cut and how he matched what was left to make it appear seamless. Carlos sat back a little, observing the look of concentration on Cecil's face as he listened, frowned deeper, made changes, listened again and nodded, lips pressed together.   
Eventually, Cecil pushed his chair back and stretched his arms out, just missing Carlos in the cramped space.  
"Oh! Carlos, I'm sorry, I have been ignoring you! I get so wrapped up in preparing for my show I get confused about what exists. Sometimes I actually wonder if the rest of the world is real, or even if I am real when I am working. Sometimes my whole existence contracts to these walls and the space inside. It's even better in the booth. Or worse, depending on your point of view."  
Cecil shrugged. Carlos laughed and kissed him once, a quick lip contact with mouth smiling and eyes open.  
"I understand, Cecil. It's good you love what you do."  
"This is ready. Want to listen to the final edit?"  
Carlos did.  
"You are so clever, Cecil, you almost made him sound like he's not an asshole!"  
"He's not really, it's all posturing and bluster. I think the grey head liked you. I edited out a comment about perfect hair and a strong jaw... Hey! Give that back!"   
Carlos laughed and leaned back in his chair to hold the headset out of reach.  
"Not until you apologise. You're teasing me!" 

Cecil reached for the headset, half standing to stretch across Carlos. He shifted his leg, swinging it over so he stood astride Carlos and reached over to where Carlos held his prize out behind him. As he giggled and clasped the headset, Carlos let go and held Cecil's face in both hands, pulling him down and kissing him.   
Cecil responded by sinking down onto Carlos's lap, making the little padded plastic chair warp slightly under their combined weight. He closed his eyes and kissed back, reaching behind to clatter the headset onto the desk. Carlos moved his hands down Cecil's back to his waist as Cecil ran both hands through Carlos's unruly hair. 

Cecil broke away, sat up, grinning, leaned his forehead against Carlos's and closed his eyes.  
"Mmmhmmhmm. It pains me to say it but I think we should exercise a little self control. I am at work after all."  
"Mmm. You are. You are working very..."  
"Carlos!" Cecil giggled and dropped his voice. "Don't you dare!"   
"Didn't you once tell me you wanted to squeeze me in your booth? I think you invited me to..."  
Cecil laughed.  
"Oh no, oh gods, you remember that? I was so embarrassed! I'm going to get up and find you somewhere to record a science news story now."  
Cecil shifted back to his own chair. Carlos shuffled upright again in his and turned his mind to science. 

Later, Cecil sat in the studio with Carlos again.  
"Carlos, these are really good."  
"Really?"  
"Really, really good. You kept exactly to time and you're speaking clearly and not too fast or too slow, and you sound really _alive_."  
"Really?... Oh, there's a _but,_ isn't there?"  
"I can't use any of them."  
"Why not?"  
"I can only broadcast about things from the approved _List of Things that Actually Exist._ I can't use your piece on clouds or the one on mountains or the lovely thing you recorded about the Moon."

Later still, Carlos sat in the second seat in Cecil's booth as Cecil started his show. He watched Cecil talk to his microphone, secure in his trust for Cecil who promised not to make him speak live on air. Cecil said it was in case Carlos was uncomfortable or nervous but Carlos suspected it was in case he said something that might get Cecil into trouble.  
Carlos admired the way Cecil didn't just talk: he gestured to his listeners, moving around in his chair, sometimes conspiratorially close and whispering into his microphone with both hands about its base, sometimes leaning away and sweeping his arms around, sometimes half standing with palms on the desk as if making a point.   
Cecil said _...and now a word from our sponsors_ and played a pre-recorded message. He turned to see Carlos staring and smiling at him. He grinned back. 

_"...and now, I take you to the Weather."_  
Cecil took off his headphones.  
"You okay there?"  
Carlos nodded. Cecil looked at the display on his desk.  
"We've got three and a half minutes."  
Cecil got up, straddled Carlos's lap again, stroked his cheek, rubbing the slight rough stubble and kissed him.  
"...and in eleven minutes I'm officially finished for the day. My last duty is to start the overnight shows and lock up. Think we can wait eleven more minutes?" 

Carlos wondered if Cecil's listeners could tell that he broadcast the closing minutes of his show from his boyfriend's lap as Carlos slowly, quietly unbuttoned Cecil's shirt to stroke and kiss bare skin. 


	6. What could possibly go wrong?

Cecil didn’t often get the chance to visit Carlos at the lab but he enjoyed watching the scientists work. He was amused at the way they seemed to work each in their own little bubble, occasionally shouting out something that, to him, sounded random but they all understood and responded in their own way. The team communicated in some arcane language that made perfect sense only to them. Cecil wondered if other scientists in other labs in other communities also developed their own dialects and languages, and if they understood each other when they met or if they had to agree some common mode of communication involving hand signals and clicks and whirrs. But maybe not all of the hand signals he saw Rochelle and Dave employ. Some were universally understood. He sat in the break area and observed. 

Busy pencil-scribble noises and clinking glassware surrounded the team.  
Carlos called out _vernier caliper?_ and put up a hand without raising his head.  
Dave grumbled _wannitback_ and put a long metal instrument onto Carlos’s bench. Carlos grunted and Dave grunted back. Carlos picked it up and measured… something. Cecil wanted to go closer to see but Carlos hated having anyone looking over his shoulder.  
Rochelle got up and frowned. _Who moved my box of capacitors?_   
_Look in the cupboard with the thermistors and the diodes, Jeez, can’t we be tidy around here?_  
 _Dave, You want my soldering iron somewhere intimate?_  
 _We have a guest, please try to act like professionals._  
 _Sorrreeee Ca-arlos_

Carlos looked up and smiled at Cecil.  
“Almost done.”  
One at a time the other scientists got up, stretched, gathered in the break area, looked at each other, glanced at Carlos and at Cecil, shrugged and said _huh?_ and _Mmh?_ nudged each other and went out. When Carlos was the only remaining scientist in the lab, he looked up again and grinned.  
“Want to see some science?”  
“Yes, I’m very into science. As you know.”  
“Okay, watch this.”  
Cecil walked over and stood beside Carlos. Carlos held up a lab-coat and Cecil slipped his arms in and shrugged it on.   
“Safety glasses are in the pocket, better put them on now.” 

Carlos picked up the device had been working on and led Cecil over to a machine the size of a large table in the corner. He fitted his device into a slot on the side and pushed it until it clicked.  
“Mmm the power unit is a perfect fit now. It wouldn’t catch before, kept popping out. You know how time works differently in Night Vale? This machine uses that effect. When I power it up, it should gather some of that weird lost time and focus it _here…”_ Carlos waved a hand over the flat surface of the device, “…and actually I am not entirely sure what will happen after that but part of being a scientist is making predictions and testing hypotheses. I predict we might get a glimpse of the past.”  
Cecil frowned.  
“Carlos is this _safe?_ Are you sure this is a good idea? I mean, revisiting the past is not always wise.”  
Carlos laughed.  
“Safe? You have your lab coat and glasses. Wise? Who am I to be the judge of that? _I_ think it is a good idea. I invented it. What could…”  
Cecil shook his head and stepped back, making cutting motions with his hands.  
“No, no, no don’t say it!”  
“…possibly go wrong?” 

Carlos held his hand out to Cecil who reluctantly took it. Carlos pulled him forward, kissed him and said, _together?_  
Cecil closed his eyes and allowed Carlos to guide his hand to the power switch. He felt pressure of Carlos’s fingers against his own, a click.  
Silence.  
Not the quiet of an empty lab with mains hum a constant background buzz and the creaks and groans of a building that already felt old when it was built. This was the silence of a building that hadn’t been thought of yet.  
Noise. The howling, screeching, rustling racket of life busy trying to avoid death.  
Cecil opened his eyes. Carlos was grinning, eyes wide open and mouth slightly agape, head up and looking around as if he didn’t want to miss a single observation. Cecil moved closer to Carlos, taking in the lush greenery of plants he had not seen even in books and feeling the dampness of mist on his skin.  
“Carloswhatthefuck…”  
Carlos hugged him and spun him round, kissed him and set him down again.”  
“THIS IS SO AWESOME! Cecil, it worked way beyond the power estimates I made. I must have been out by a power of ten somewhere in my calculations and the error multiplied up. Cecil, it didn’t just create a little bubble of the past we could look at, IT BROUGHT THE WHOLE FUCKING PAST TO US! This is… this is just… this is just so…” Carlos had to borrow a word. “NEAT!” 

Cecil opened his mouth to ask Carlos if he knew how to get back since the machine that brought the distant past crashing up around them was nowhere in sight. Instead he yelled and pointed. Carlos's eyes followed the direction of Cecil's outstretched arm. He grabbed Cecil and ran, pulling the terrified radio host along beside him. They pelted through the undergrowth, not stopping until Carlos tripped and fell into a damp hollow in the ground, dragging Cecil over on top of him.  
They lay there, holding tight to each other against the fear, as silent as their heaving lungs and rasping breath allowed. Cecil noticed a space defined by the buttressed roots of the tree they lay beside and the thick vines growing everywhere. He tapped Carlos and nodded his head to show what he had found.   
Carlos craned his neck to look and nodded. Cecil slowly shifted and crawled for the shelter, Carlos followed, listening for the sound of the creature they had seen, hoping it had given up its brief pursuit. He heard a cry from above, a sound reminding him of birds of prey only deeper, richer. Carlos held tight to Cecil, curling protectively around him in the small, dim space. 

Carlos whispered.  
"I think we're safe if we stay here. Its eyes might be most sensitive to motion and change so if we stay still we will be difficult to spot."  
"Can it hear us? Smell us?"  
"I don't know. I guess it won't recognise our voices as the sound of prey but it might be inquisitive. I would need to examine it more closely to find out about its olfactory sensitivity. Honestly, I'm really curious but I'm not keen."  
"No, don't go out there."  
"It kinda reminds me of someone."  
Cecil grinned despite his nerves.  
"No, I only counted one head. It had all five colours though." 

Carlos shifted a little as he realised death wasn't coming for them immediately in the form of reptilian jaws with an impressive collection of razor sharp teeth for ripping flesh and a gullet flexible enough to swallow whole limbs. He still held on to Cecil but gave him a little more space to move. Cecil pushed himself up and sat.  
"Carlos, how do we get home?"  
"I guess we wait for the machine to power down itself. It should run out of battery power in an hour or so."  
"Oh, we can hide here until it happens. It must have been at least twenty minutes already."  
"Um, yes, about that..."  
"Are you going to tell me time runs differently here and you have no idea how long we're stuck in this hole with nature trying to recycle us as quickly as possible?"  
Carlos shrugged and hugged Cecil.  
"It's possible. I really want to go exploring. Take some samples back for analysis, maybe take some pictures and..." 

Carlos and Cecil froze, silent and listening to the sounds of footsteps crashing through the undergrowth and snuffling, wheezing noises hinting at the presence of a predator large enough not to care if it was seen and heard.  
The footsteps stopped in front of their hideout.  
The snuffling and wheezing resumed, getting closer.  
A set of jaws blocked the exit from their shelter before a single glossy black eye peered into the gloom.  
Carlos and Cecil held tight to each other, trying not to move and fighting the basic need for breath, fighting the urge to scream and yell and fight and run.  
Cecil closed his eyes tight and burrowed his head into Carlos's shoulder. Carlos wrapped himself around Cecil again.  
"I'm sorry, Cecil, I..." 

With a head-spinning swirling feeling, the long-extinct predator was gone. In its place, Rochelle stood holding the power unit. It had a thin trail of blue smoke rising from it and the unmistakable scent of burnt out electronics filled the lab.  
"Jeez, Carlos, I leave you for half an hour and you go and warp time. Way to go. Why are you in the cupboard? Am I interrupting something?" 


	7. Mountains out of molehills

Cecil frowned at Carlos. It wasn't the first time they had had this discussion but Carlos wouldn't let it drop.  
"Cecil, you can't just deny mountains exist. It's insane! I showed you photographs of my mountain biking holiday with my Canadian cousins and everything."  
Cecil rolled his eyes.  
"What _ever._ You don't get it. You're an outsider, how could you understand? Mountains. Are. False. All mountains are lies. Look around, drive out to the desert and look. It's flat! Wherever you look, flat."  
"But out towards Desert Bluffs..."  
"NO! NO! NO!"  
Cecil almost screamed at Carlos.  
"Do NOT mention that place!" 

Carlos left the room before he lost his temper. Even his most surly students had been more open minded than his boyfriend. He uncovered Cecil's bathroom mirror and rinsed his face, carefully covering the mirror once he thought he looked calm again. He padded back through to the living room.  
Cecil was still frowning.  
"Carlos? You mustn't tell me any more about mountains. I don't want to hear more lies."  
"Fine."  
Carlos put his shoes on, picked up his lab-coat and went home to his lab without bothering to kiss his boyfriend goodnight. 

There was always science. Science didn't call him a liar. Science looked at the evidence and came to rational conclusions. Science stayed calm at all times. Carlos clattered glassware as he checked the chalkboard on the wall where the team kept a _"Super Cool List of Awesome Experiments We Haven't Done Yet"_ and signed his name next to _Find out what concentration of alcohol will get semi-sentient clock-goop to sing along with the Weather._  
Carlos prepared solutions, carefully measuring out neat ethanol, pipetting it into clean volumetric flasks, making up the solutions with deionised water and setting up the still to replenish their supplies.  
He went to the soundproofed refrigerator and removed one of the clocks from inside, opened the back and weighed out controlled quantities of the grey bristly substance that ran time in Night Vale.  
He was almost ready to begin observations. There was one thing missing: weather.  
The only person who could help now was the last person Carlos wanted to talk to. Sometimes Science had to suck it up. 

"Cecil?"  
"Carlos! Oh Carlos, I'm..."  
"I am not calling for personal reasons."  
"Oh."  
"I need you to broadcast the Weather. For science. Can you do that?"  
"Carlos, you know I'm at home. It's almost eleven, the station is on automatic until morning. I can't broadcast."  
"Oh. But my experiment... it's really important science..."  
"I could come round and bring some Weather forecasts with me?" 

Carlos unlocked the lab door so Cecil could come in without knocking and waking anyone up. He did not look up as the door swished shut and Cecil strode across the lab. Cecil dumped a bag on the floor and crouched to rummage in it.  
"I didn't know what you needed so I brought a selection. There are some real long-range forecasts here too, so long-range they have not been on the show yet. Do you want instrumental? vocals? singer-songwriter? Something folky...?"  
"Anything that makes you want to sing along. It's for science, not for me."  
"Oh. Okay. I can do that."  
Cecil resumed rummaging in his bag, producing a portable CD player and a stack of identically unmarked CDs. He sorted through them, frowning and humming quietly until, with a softly whispered _Ah! Perfect!_ he popped a CD out of its case and placed it in the player.  
Carlos prepared the first sample for study.  
"Not too loud, Cecil, I don't want to wake the entire team and I need to be able to listen for a positive result. You can go if you want, I expect you will find this boring."  
"I want to stay. I'm really into science these days. I thought you knew that." 

Cecil watched as Carlos measured and marked the position of the beaker and the position of the CD player, wrote down the volume setting after adjusting it, playing through the old weather forecast once. He smiled at Carlos's meticulous attention to detail as he repeated exactly the same procedure with successive samples. 

"Aren't you tired?"  
"Sssh Cecil, I need to listen to the sample."  
"I brought snacks. Are you hungry?"  
"You can't eat in here, Cecil."  
"But you like falafel, and there's dip."  
"Cecil, did you bring a picnic to the lab?"  
"Might've. You can't work properly if you're hungry. You left before dinner."  
"Cecil, is that... _wine?"_

Carlos sat back. So far his alcoholised goop samples all remained stubbornly silent.  
"I might as well take a break."  
He took falafel, dipped it in the sauce and chewed. Cecil handed him a plastic cup.  
"Here, it's still a bit chilled."  
"Thanks. I'll set up the last sample first. I hope this hasn't all been a waste of time, journals hate negative results even though they are a valid and important part of the scientific process."  
Cecil watched Carlos carefully align the last beaker with the marks on the bench-top.  
"Oh I don't think this has been a waste of time at all. I get to hang out and do science with my favourite scientist and talk about the weather." 

Carlos met Cecil's gaze at last. Cecil smiled at him and topped up his plastic cup. Carlos put the cup down and reached out for Cecil's hand. "Carlos, I'm sorry I reacted badly earlier. About the... you know. Things."  
"I'm sorry I stormed off."  
"Are we okay?"  
Carlos stroked a stray strand of hair from Cecil's face.  
"I hope so, but we need to talk about this stuff. Not the things you don't want me to mention, I mean about you telling me I'm a liar because I know about things you don't..."  
"...and you thinking I'm a bit stupid because I'm not a scientist like you. I am trying, Carlos."  
Carlos froze.  
"Shit, Cecil, I don't think that at all! Do I make you think.... Oh. Oh no." 

Carlos put his head in his hands and rocked gently back and forward. Cecil sat beside him on another lab stool and put an arm around his shoulders.  
"Carlos? Carlos, look at me."  
Carlos kept his face hidden.  
"I always do this, Cecil. I'm sorry. I don't even notice. It's why I get left."  
"Carlos, stop it. Look at me. It's midnight and I came over with food to do science with you and look after you. I'm not leaving."  
Cecil pulled Carlos's hands away from his face and cupped his jaw with a hand to angle his face up. He kissed Carlos gently.  
"What if we agree that I tell you whenever you make me feel stupid and you tell me whenever I imply you're lying? Right away, I mean, not hours later when it's all built up into something bigger than it is?"  
Carlos nodded and threw his arms around Cecil. Cecil manoeuvred Carlos to his feet and hugged him tight. 

Rochelle was on early shift and it was her job to open up the lab. She was not surprised to find the door unlocked, Carlos often worked strange hours. She went in, expecting to see him with his head down, scribbling frantically in his notes or staring at some specimen or other, ready to talk full-speed about whatever he had just found out.  
She did not expect to find Carlos asleep on the break area floor with Cecil curled around him, snuggled under a large size lab coat while a sample of pickled clock-goop crooned quietly on the table. 


	8. The Mountain

"Are you ready, Cecil?"  
"Yeah, come up and gimme a hand."  
"Be there in a sec."  
Carlos pocketed his phone and parked properly. He got out of the car and ran upstairs to Cecil's apartment. The door was ajar so he went in. He stopped in the cramped hallway, mouth open and laughed.  
"Cecil! How much stuff have you packed? We're only going for two or three days, four tops!"  
Cecil laughed too.  
"Just the necessities, Carlos, you said pack light so I did. That pile is the camping gear, over there are our emergency rations and storm gear, this lot is games and books in case we get bored and this," Cecil held up a small holdall, "is my clothing."  
Carlos rolled his eyes.  
"Okay, bring the camping gear, half of the clothing and yourself." 

It still took half an hour to pack the car efficiently. Cecil was reluctant to leave anything behind and Carlos suggested they should find a motel instead of camping out.  
"No, I promised to show you what a good Night Vale scout can do so we are camping. Where are we going, anyway?"  
"It wouldn't be a mystery tour without a mystery."  
Cecil grinned and blew Carlos a kiss. Carlos smiled back and got into the driver's seat.  
"You packed drinks and snacks in the front, right?"  
"Yeah, look in the cool-box behind you."  
Cecil twisted round, kneeling on the passenger seat to reach over and check the box was well stocked.  
"I guess we're good to go!" 

Carlos took advantage of a comfort break to check the map on his phone as he walked around to ease the tingle in his back. They had been on the road for four hours and the scenery was starting to green up as they headed out of the desert. Cecil hadn't commented if he noticed the road was getting less straight, more winding and undulating as they entered the foothills. Carlos double-checked they were on the right road for _Mount Wassat State Park_ and, for the fourth time since packing the car, checked he had the necessary parking and camping permits.  
"You need to stretch your legs some more?"  
Cecil appeared from the low building serving as shop, cafe and gas station.  
"Yeah. May as well fill up while we're here too." 

"Carrrrrloooos... are we..."  
"Neeee-arly there yet?"  
They both giggled.  
"Yes. We should have plenty of time to get the tent up and a campfire going before it gets dark."  
Carlos soon swung the car off the main road and followed a narrow, twisty lane for a few miles. It ended in a small car park with an information kiosk at the entrance. A man in a hat asked to see their permits and nodded.  
"Fires in fire pits only, pack your litter when you leave and don't kill anything that isn't trying to kill you. Even then, think carefully about what you might've done to deserve _death by nature_."  
"Okay, thank you. Goodnight!"  
Carlos grinned at Cecil.  
"We're here!" 

The campsite was just beyond the car park, surrounded by trees that equally sheltered and obstructed. They got the tent up, Cecil shouted instructions Carlos struggled to understand.  
"Cecil? I think I am beginning to understand how I sometimes make you feel when I talk about science. I'm sorry."  
"Carlos, you are utterly and completely forgiven. Fire is science, right? Want to get a fire going?"  
Carlos did. But _fire_ in the context of exothermic reactions, Bunsen burners and controlled explosions is a different beast from the _campfire_ and Cecil had to step in and show him how to choose fuel, get it lit and _keep_ it lit.  
Soon they sat side by side, the only human inhabitants of the little campsite, barbecuing dinner and drinking the first beer of many from the cooler. Carlos lay back and watched Cecil showing off his scouting skills. A warm feeling infusing his being, one that had nothing to do with the flames or the beer.  
"Cecil?"  
"Yeah?"  
"You know I love you, right?"  
"Yeah. I love you too. Uh, you sure you're on your first beer? Oh, I think your dinner is on fire."  
Carlos sat up and swore as Cecil laughed. 

Later, they let the fire die down. Cecil suggested taking Carlos for a night walk in the woods but the scientist's night vision was far below the limit for safety. After the third tripping incident Cecil guided Carlos within sight of the embers of their campfire, gently walked him backwards to lean against a tree and kissed him, whispering things about _doing experiments on the trees_ making Carlos whimper and blush and ask to be led back to the tent. Cecil spoke, a low voice near Carlos's ear.  
"Why? There's nobody here but us. It's dark. We could just..."  
Cecil kissed Carlos again and pressed their hips together, hiding nothing, slipping a hand onto Carlos's waistband, hooking fingers around the top button.  
"...right here. You want to?"  
Carlos managed a syllable of enthusiastic consent. 

Next morning Cecil woke with the sunrise, watched Carlos for a few minutes and snuggled back to sleep for another two hours. They woke properly when the sunlight filtering through the trees cast dancing shadow puppets on their tent fabric.  
"Mmmm good morning."  
"Good morning. Can you move?"  
"Not sure yet. How do you scouts sleep like this?"  
"I rarely slept on scout camps. My friends and I would wait until the scoutmaster went to sleep, get up again and go exploring in the dark. Earl... did you ever meet Scoutmaster Harlan? We used to get up and loosen the other scouts' guy ropes so their tents would fall down in the wind."  
"Urgh. Speaking of wind, I have to get out of this enclosed space. For scientific reasons."  
Carlos crawled out of the tent and stretched as he made for the cover of the undergrowth. Cecil lit a fire and made coffee. Carlos returned to find a pretty decent breakfast waiting for him. Cecil laughed at his delighted expression.  
"Hey, just because we're out in the wilds doesn't mean we can't be civilised." 

After breakfast and a tidy up, Carlos announced they were going for a hike and should pack some food to take with them. He checked his park map and worked out which of the official trails they should take for best effect.  
"Cecil? We could carry the tent and camp further up if you like."  
"Further up? It's pretty bulky. We could carry the sleeping bags and camp out if it stays dry. It's not cold and there's always shelter where there are trees."  
"No matter, we can just come back here." 

Carlos checked the trail guide one more time.  
"This way, Cecil."  
"Are you sure? I'm the scout after all."  
"Definitely this way. I used science."  
"Oh? No use arguing with that."  
Carlos held out his hand and Cecil took it. They walked side by side until the trail narrowed as it rose. They stepped over tree roots, jumped off rocks and leapt over narrow streams crossing the trail. The trail wound back and forwards, up and down and up again. Carlos noticed the general direction was roughly north and definitely up.  
After a few hours of walking, forest sounds interspersed with scouting reminiscences and science, they reached the tree-line. Carlos pulled Cecil through the short section where the vegetation thinned and out of the woods altogether. He pointed.  
"What do you call this, Cecil?" 

Cecil gaped.  
He stared left and right, forward and back and _up_.  
He sat on the ground, working his fingers into the earth.  
Carlos sat beside him, arms around him for a moment and eased Cecil's backpack from his shoulders.  
"We can rest here for a while. Are you hungry?"  
"..."  
"No? Okay. Do you want to go higher? We'll get cold if we just sit here. I think the summit is a little too far, but the view from up..."  
"Carlos... areWEonafucKINGMOUNTAIN?" 

Carlos held on to Cecil until the radio host stopped ranting. He confirmed yes, they were on a mountain. Yes, there was another, different mountain over there and you see those blue shadows in the distance? Mountains. So many mountains.  
Cecil insisted on going back to the campsite. By the time they got there, Carlos argued it was too late to pack up and leave but they could go first thing in the morning. 

It was a cold night. 

"Cecil?"  
Carlos woke up alone in the tent and stiff from another night on hard ground. He poked his head out of the tent.  
"Cecil?"  
"I'm here. If we pack now we can have breakfast at the diner we passed on the way here."  
"Okay."  
Carlos got up and got dressed quickly.  
"Cecil?"  
"Mmmhmm?"  
"I'm sorry."  
"Okay." 

They packed the car in silence. Carlos drove them back out of the park the way they had come in, the unmentionable mountains behind and out of sight. They stopped at the dingy diner for coffee.  
"Cecil, what is it about m... you know... that is such a problem?"  
Cecil sighed and took both of Carlos's hands in his across the table. Carlos looked around, this wasn't exactly Night Vale, but the diner was empty apart from them and the waitress who smiled and brought more coffee before returning her attention to her phone. Cecil moved to sit next to Carlos rather than opposite him.  
"It's not mountains, Carlos. Of course they exist. I know. It's just... when the City Council decides something isn't real, it stops being real. When the secret police get involved there are repercussions." Cecil rolled his eyes.  
"You can trust my experience on the matter. So, mountains aren't real. We won't eat wheat. You can't use a pen in a public place. The moon... actually I'm not so clear about the moon myself. Carlos, I'm trying to keep you safe. Keep _us_ safe. But you sabotage my efforts at every turn! I'm so afraid of losing you because you could say the wrong thing to the wrong person and get taken away from me just because you don't know the rules, because nobody talks about anything. I can't stand it."  
Carlos squeezed Cecil's hands once and let go.  
"Come on, let's go home."

The rest of the drive was quiet, but it was a different kind of quiet. A comfortable, companionable quiet rather than the stony silence of before. Cecil fell asleep with his hand on Carlos's knee. Eventually Carlos pulled up outside Cecil's apartment block. He stretched and turned off the ignition. Cecil woke up.  
"I'll help unload and put stuff away."  
"No, it can wait. Leave it all in the car until tomorrow."  
Carlos frowned.  
"But I'll be..."  
"You'll be...?"  
"...still here to help you in the morning?"  
Cecil smiled.  
"That would be neat." 


	9. Not Perfect.

The phone rang. Well, not _rang_ exactly, the personalised ringtone Cecil had assigned to Carlos's number played, a thirty second clip of _The Elements Song._ Cecil had not heard more than eleven seconds of it, the longest time it took him to find his phone and answer it when Carlos called. If he was awake.  
"Carlos? Carlos! How are you? So good to hear from you!"  
"Hi Cecil, I'm fine. Is everything okay with you?"  
"Yes, I miss you but I'm okay. Is there any sign..."  
"Cecil, we talked about this."  
"Sorry. I just want you home."  
"I know. And I promise I'm looking and I promise I'll tell you as soon as I find a way. It's just... hard. I miss you too."  
"I know. I don't mean to put pressure on you."  
"Umm..."  
"So tell me what science you have done this week? Have you seen Doug and Aleesha? Are they well?" 

Carlos chatted about the desert and his occasional companions, joked about all the places sand could get lodged, complained that although he was never hungry he really missed food.  
"Oh, you poor thing. When you get back we can go out to all your favourite places. And Tourniquet, maybe we can get a table. The food is... unique."  
Carlos smiled into his phone.  
"I'm glad you're getting out a bit more, Cecil, seeing people. I saw you bowling, last time I was in the lighthouse. It was so sweet the way the Erika... oh, sorry. I forgot I shouldn't say..."  
"It's okay Carlos, the Secret Police left a note written in barbecue sauce to say they didn't listen to our calls any more. Something about there not being much drama and they were spying on Amber and Wilson instead to see if they ever get together.  
Carlos laughed until he almost cried.  
"You okay, Carlos?"  
"Yes. I'm fine." 

Cecil paused and frowned. Carlos was hiding something.  
"Carlos, I can tell something's wrong. Is it the desert? Have you fallen out with Doug again?"  
"No, no, Cecil it's nothing like that. It's nothing. I'm sure."  
"Caa-aar-los, tell me what's bothering you."  
"It's nothing. Really. Just..."  
Carlos went quiet.  
"I was in the lighthouse a few days ago, you know, looking at the pictures to see if you were there because I wanted to see you again and... and I did see you. You were..."  
Cecil heard a muffled choking noise from the other end of the conversation. He heard Carlos breathe deeply, in and out a couple of times. It gave Cecil time to think. _A couple of days ago? Could mean anything up to a week and a half here. Where was I... what was I doing..._ Cecil realised at exactly the moment Carlos found the strength to speak again.  
"I saw you with someone." 

"Carlos, it's not what it looks like."  
"Then tell me what it is, Cecil! I've been racking my brain for two days trying to come up with an explanation that isn't... isn't..."  
Cecil listened, unable to help as Carlos sobbed into the phone.  
"Shit, Cecil, sorry. I wan't going to do this. I wasn't going to say anything. That way I could hope..."  
"Carlos? All it was...CARLOS! Jeez, Carlos, I love you. You."  
"I saw you with someone else. You were sitting opposite each other. It looked late, an empty restaurant. And you looked so happy I thought... And I looked away for a while because I was upset and when I looked back the picture had changed, time had jumped or something and you were gone. You were both gone."  
"Carlos, will you stay calm, listen and let me tell you what happened?" 

Carlos quietened down and waited for Cecil to explain, to tell him how wrong he was.  
"I met Earl Harlan, you know, old schoolfriend, Scoutmaster Harlan, Eternal Scout Ceremony... mute children... carried off into the void... the Earl Harlan I told you about before? Turns out he wasn't lost forever, He's a chef. I invited him onto the show and it was a real success so I wanted to invite him back. He's real busy at the restaurant so I said I'd go round at closing time to talk about what he would do on the show next time he was able to come on with me."  
Cecil stopped to check Carlos was listening. He heard throat clearing and sniffling, imagined Carlos wiping his face on his sleeve.  
"Carlos? Earl cooked for me. We had dinner, chatted, laughed about pranks we used to play on our old incantations teacher by deliberately getting key syllables wrong and summoning... Uh, you don't need all of that boring detail. We had dinner, we chatted and reminisced, we agreed a recipe that would work on a radio show and we went home."  
"Yeah?"  
"Yeah. Separately. Carlos, I love you, just you."  
"Oh."  
Cecil heard more quiet throat clearing followed by a tired voice.  
"I love you too Cecil." 

Cecil closed his eyes for a few seconds.  
"Carlos, are you worried? About us?"  
"I was, I guess. On some level. Cecil, when you first talked about me on your show so long ago I was so confused. I couldn't believe anyone could feel like that about me. Even after we were dating and you agreed we should live together, I still thought I didn't deserve you, you would meet someone better, someone who would never forget dates or forget to come home at night, someone who would always put you first and always be there for you. I saw the picture of you looking so happy, laughing with someone else and I thought _it has happened, I'm not there and he's found someone better._ Cecil, I felt awful."  
"Carlos..."  
"Sometimes the only things keeping me from despair are science and the knowledge you will be there when I return."  
"Oh! You said it! Carlos!"  
"What?"  
"You said _when I return,_ not _if,_ you said _when!"_

Carlos smiled.  
"I want to come home, Cecil, I mean, here is okay and I'm fine, mostly fine, but I miss you."  
"I know."  
"I will go sort myself out and call you back in half..."  
Cecil almost yelled down the phone.  
"Don't you dare hang up! I want you there on the phone even if we have run out of things to talk about, which I have not!"  
Carlos wrapped his grimy lab-coat around himself tightly.  
"Okay." 

Cecil shared a silent minute with Carlos.  
"Carlos? I don't want someone like you described. I don't want to be looked after by someone who puts me first all the time. I don't want some perfect boyfriend who is _always there for me_ and never late and never goes missing for days because other stuff is just so damn fascinating to him. I don't want that. I want you. Just you. We have problems sometimes, we argue, and it's okay. We always make up even if neither of us apologises. And it's okay too because the things we argue about don't matter. You can look after yourself. I can look after myself. We are okay apart, just better together. I'd hate the person you described, the person you think I should be with. You're... different. You challenge me and I think you find me... challenging at times."  
Cecil waited for a reaction.  
"So you're not leaving me for a friend you just happened to run into."  
"No."  
"Am I the biggest idiot in the otherworldly desert dimension?"  
"The most handsome, smartest idiot with the best hair in the entire desert hellscape."  
"Aw, you have such a way with words! Cecil, I'm sorry I got so upset over nothing." 

They stayed on the phone for a while, not always talking, until Cecil's battery warning flashed and buzzed.  
"Oh! My charger... dammit I left it at work."  
"You should get a spare."  
"Uh-huh, thanks Professor Helpful. You're not going to worry yourself again about us, are you?"  
"No. No more than I did before I got stuck here."  
"Just keep looking and know I will be waiting for you to find your way back to me."  
"And in the meantime I will not get upset when I see you getting on with your life."  
"I love you."  
"I lo..."  
The rest of Carlos's sentence got cut off when Cecil's phone ran out of power. But it was okay. They both knew they would be okay. 


End file.
